Fear
I used to force myself to listen to mass with all my heart before. But every now and then, I can't help but lose my attention. Now that I look back on it, I can forgive myself for losing interest in the parts that are just repeated week after week after week, but then again, no forgiving should be done. I've ceased to believe.
I've laid it out very clearly on almost all of my posts up to this one that I have lost my faith in religion. And every time I write about my anger, my contempt and my criticism at the church of irony, I fear. I'm afraid that my mother would click the link out of curiosity or perhaps my cousin in America (who knows me as a devout young man.) I ask myself: if I know reason is on my side, then why should I be afraid? Because religion is never equal to reason. They didn't believe in Galileo's proof on the Copernican hypothesis. They don't believe that dinosaurs existed in the beginning; the Garden of Eden used to be there. They don't believe that homosexuals are that way by birth. Well, they may have ceased believing in those ideas after a loooooooong time, but that would be forsaking the Bible, wouldn't it? Yes. Yes, it is. It's in the Old Testament.
Hell, I think they don't even know that.
Maybe they're different. But they're old people, and old dogs can't learn new tricks. Especially dogs like them. They live within the norms of society.
(But my parents are loose, in a lot of ways, and I'm thankful for that.)
Being thankful
I was watching the news about the earthquake in Italy. 33 dead among around 250 or so in a small town, and there was a woman who lost her 18-year-old son in the quake. Force of habit, I thought: God bless you, ma'am. But no, the God I believe in now doesn't work like that. Yeah. That's one of religion's perks: if you can't do anything about it (or if you think you can't do anything about it), you just pray. But no, I can't do that anymore. I have to do something. I can't just wait for the apple to fall for me. The report ended with them showing us how we could help.
Did I even try helping? No.
Jeep
I was on my way to SM Sucat when I suddenly realized that all my knowledge about scripture helped me lose my faith.
Final words
I used to force myself to listen to mass with all my heart before. But every now and then, I can't help but lose my attention. Now that I look back on it, I can forgive myself for losing interest in the parts that are just repeated week after week after week, but then again, no forgiving should be done. I've ceased to believe.
I've laid it out very clearly on almost all of my posts up to this one that I have lost my faith in religion. And every time I write about my anger, my contempt and my criticism at the church of irony, I fear. I'm afraid that my mother would click the link out of curiosity or perhaps my cousin in America (who knows me as a devout young man.) I ask myself: if I know reason is on my side, then why should I be afraid? Because religion is never equal to reason. They didn't believe in Galileo's proof on the Copernican hypothesis. They don't believe that dinosaurs existed in the beginning; the Garden of Eden used to be there. They don't believe that homosexuals are that way by birth. Well, they may have ceased believing in those ideas after a loooooooong time, but that would be forsaking the Bible, wouldn't it? Yes. Yes, it is. It's in the Old Testament.
Hell, I think they don't even know that.
Maybe they're different. But they're old people, and old dogs can't learn new tricks. Especially dogs like them. They live within the norms of society.
(But my parents are loose, in a lot of ways, and I'm thankful for that.)
Being thankful
I was watching the news about the earthquake in Italy. 33 dead among around 250 or so in a small town, and there was a woman who lost her 18-year-old son in the quake. Force of habit, I thought: God bless you, ma'am. But no, the God I believe in now doesn't work like that. Yeah. That's one of religion's perks: if you can't do anything about it (or if you think you can't do anything about it), you just pray. But no, I can't do that anymore. I have to do something. I can't just wait for the apple to fall for me. The report ended with them showing us how we could help.
Did I even try helping? No.
Jeep
I was on my way to SM Sucat when I suddenly realized that all my knowledge about scripture helped me lose my faith.
Final words
Old Testament
There can be no mercy without suffering. Hence, Lucifer fell.
New Testament
There can be no suffering without betrayal. Hence, Judas forsook.
Toned down?
Oh, and I remembered in mass last Sunday. The psalm was "My God, why have you abandoned me?"
And I kept telling myself, "It's forsaken, damn it! Forsaken!"
New Testament
There can be no suffering without betrayal. Hence, Judas forsook.
Toned down?
Oh, and I remembered in mass last Sunday. The psalm was "My God, why have you abandoned me?"
And I kept telling myself, "It's forsaken, damn it! Forsaken!"
"Maybe they're different. But they're old people, and old dogs can't learn new tricks. Especially dogs like them. They live within the norms of society. But they're loose, in a lot of ways, and I'm thankful for that."
ReplyDeletevery very very true. that is why i am saddened by this mentality that can't seem to be erased.
"I used to force myself to listen to mass with all my heart before. But every now and then, I can't help but lose my attention."
ReplyDelete~You don't have to force yourself to listen. Just understand what is being said.
"I've ceased to believe."
~In the existence of God and the doctrines of Faith?
"I'm afraid that my mother would click the link out of curiosity or perhaps my cousin in America (who knows me as a "devout young man.")"
~What made you change your mind/belief? (Aside from the pretenders?)
~Sometimes, we lose ourselves with the flaws of humanity, but that doesn't mean that we have to change what we believe in. I've always asked myself... if I'd continue believing. And I've come to a conclusion that I'll still continue to believe. (Based on experiences.)
"But no, the God I believe in now doesn't work like that. Yeah. That's one of religion's perks: if you can't do anything about it (or if you think you can't do anything about it), you just pray. But no, I can't do that anymore. I have to do something. I can't just wait for the apple to fall for me."
~That's why there's the Filipino saying, "Nasa Diyos ang awa, nasa tao ang gawa".
"I was on my way to SM Sucat when I suddenly realized that all my knowledge about scripture helped me lose my faith."
~Sometimes, our knowledge can alter our beliefs. Proven by Science. (Try watching NatGeo's episode about Christianity) Dumrami na ang alam ng tao.
Tandaan, palagi nang magkasama ngayon ang: Religion at Science
experience God on your own. then decide if He's really there or not. Chances are, you're just not looking the right way. ^_^ and the fact that you're willing to look, proves you believe He could be there. ^_^
ReplyDeletethe bible contradicts a lot of things it says, cuz so many people put their own way of thinking into it. but i say, read how your life should be lived on your own.
be your own bible. find God your way.
believe at your own pace.